i am lying in my bed crying
wondering how things can be fixed
there is so much hurt and pain
and i need you to feel the abyss
i walk so proud and as nothing is wrong
but really on the inside my emotions eat at me
i know that one day it has to get better
i am just waiting for it
all i ask is for a friendship
maybe that is too much
how can i do so much damage
not even knowing that i did
i can not help but wonder how a friendship can be minded
Sometimes at work I have a moment where things settle down for a while. That is when my mind starts to wonder and this poem is just where it happened to go. I have loved to write poems since I was a child and for the longest time I had quit writing. I have come to realize that writing poems helps me with my life and what goes on in it.
As I suspected
The darkness has came over me
Just what I had suspected
I walk around in the blackness
Looking for the light
I know it has to be here somewhere
I am just not sure where
I am sitting here quietly
Waiting to hear a sound
As I come to find there is nothing to hear
I had hoped it did not come to this
So I sit here in the darkness
Never giving up on the light
I know it is somewhere close by
Then I think maybe just sitting is not the thing to do
I need to feel my way through the dark
There is a light somewhere
I just need to be patient
As I continue my search for the light.
The Darkness
April, wrote on July 14, 2009
I am looking into the darkness,
trying to find a light.
I fight with all my strength,
to keep you in my arms.
I know if you drift away,
I could lose you forever in the darkness.
I have never experienced a love,
like the love I have for you.
I have an unbearable pain inside me,
one that is indescribable.
I have loved you with all that I had,
and it seems it has went to waste.
I want to take back time,
and freeze it to when we were first together,
before all the hurt and pain that I have caused.
I know I can’t reverse time,
all I can do is move forward into the darkness,hoping to find a new light with you.
I am one of those people that think everything happens for a reason. All through my life people have came in and out of my life and I have theirs also. I think God puts people in places to for a reason. For example when I was younger my family moved all the time, but to this day I still talk to some of them. I have not kept great contact with some of them and most the time they have not kept in touch with me. I know one person I feel that God has kept in my life simply because there have been many incidents that has occurred and we always are reacquainted with each other. Not even a hurricane was able to keep us from talking. So I wrote this poem years ago and I dedicate it to Belinda Puckett. Thank you for always being there to help in my hard times as I was a child. Thank you for also believing in me and encouraging me too.
I wrote this poem on 11-15-1997
Not By Luck
I wish I had a friend,
a friend that would love me.
Love me for what I am,
I am what they love me for.
I don't know why they care,
they care to take the time.
The time to get to know me and show me that they care.
They are my friends not by luck, but by God.
And I am glad that luck has not guided our friendship, but God guides it.
I wrote this for English class, the type of poem is an Epitaph.
Who Knows
As I walk through the streets,
I realize I am alone.
I am looking all around,
just to find my friends.
I have got the job of my dreams,
being an actress.
I have to go my own way,
just as I feel the need.
Again I find myself looking,
all around the town.
I have just thing to think,
what is going on?
My friends are not around,
all the stores are closed.
I leave on my way home,
to find myself getting raped.
Following the rape ,
I feel a blade through my back,
a razor slicing open my head,
as I am left stranded.
With nobody at my side
the only people to depend on is me, myself, and I
Through the trees, I hear a noise,
the last noise I will ever hear.
I thought it was the rapist,
coming back to kill.
I look to the right, to find myself eye to eye
with not a man, but a dog
that a man followed.
I am gasping for one simple breath.
while I bleed rapidly.
People thought I would make it, if I really tried.
All that was left was to close my eyes and die.
My eyes were closed and all I heard,
were words that were a blur.
As I feel my last swallow, that took all of my energy.
I feel one last thing and that was my last heart beat, as I tensed up and died.
Hey, I am posting this blog in hopes that you will help me. My girlfriend ( Angela) is a pretty decent writer and for some reason I can not convince her of it. Here are a few of her poems.
Lovely Things
It is the lovely things that keep me alive.
Lovely things, of which I was deprived.
It is the lovely things such as your touch.
Lovely things that I long for so much.
It is the lovely things, watching the sunrise.
Lovely things, that sparkles in your eyes.
It is the lovely things, your lips on mine.
Lovely things, feeling the tingle up my spine.
It is the lovely things, your body next to me.
Lovely things, it is only you I see.
It is your lovely things that I desire.
Lovely things like this set my heart on fire.
We
She is me and I am her.
Beautiful blue eyes cannot disguise
Her hurt that lies within.
Her broken heart in mend.
With her I must be fragile.
With her love is hard to handle.
Her pain buried beneath.
Scares me to see underneath.
I won’t hurt her, for I cannot.
She is me and I am her.
Together mending we are we.
I wish I could see what you see in me.
I wish I could be what you want me to be.
I wish I didn't hurt you again and again.
I wish I would be a better friend.
I wish I didn't disappoint you completely.
I wish I wouldn't leave you feeling empty.Dreaming
I lay awake in bed.
Thoughts of you flood my head.
I drift into peaceful bliss.
Suddenly I am asleep to dream.
Your smile captivating my dreams.
I find your eyes ever so inviting.
With your touch I am soothed.
Your embrace leaves me breathless.
Passionately we kiss again and again.
Together in the rain, lying side by side.
We are alone to relish in our affection.
There is only you, there is only I.
I am dreaming for what is certain to be.
I wish I could love myself the way you do.
I wish these things I wouldn't put you through.
I wish like birds we could soar.
I wish I could do this and so much more.
Dreaming
I lay awake in bed.
Thoughts of you flood my head.
I drift into peaceful bliss.
Suddenly I am asleep to dream.
Your smile captivating my dreams.
I find your eyes ever so inviting.
With your touch I am soothed.
Your embrace leaves me breathless.
Passionately we kiss again and again.
Together in the rain, lying side by side.
We are alone to relish in our affection.
There is only you, there is only I.
I am dreaming for what is certain to be.
Now this is just a few of her writings. You can help me to help her by leaving a friendly post. please. She is also know as the auther of the blog GRACE NEEDS FREEDOM.
here is the link http://www.ange29.blogspot.com/
The way I feel
When I sit here and close my eyes, I picture all the things we do.
The walks we take through the trails, your sweet lips pressed to mine.
I thrive for your every touch; which is such an adrenaline rush.
The feel of your hand holding mine, makes me quiver all over.
I love the way you look at me with your eyes so deep into mine.
Just the look in your eyes can turn me on.
May 1 2008
ONLY THE BEGINNING
I sit and think about the times we share,
wishing that I was still there.
The way you touched me on my hands,
makes me want you for more than friends.
I wish I had the courage to tell you,
all the things I'd like to do.
If I had the nerve to make a move,
I'd hold you close in my arms and
respire in your sweet aroma with every breath.
I'd tenderly kiss you on your lips,
while I massage my fingers through your hair.
Each moment that I spend with you,
just makes me want you that much more.
I just can't express the way I feel.
I love the way you look at me.
Your smiles, warm on the coldest days.
Eyes are beautiful as the morning sun.
A heart of comfort is what you have.
And this is only the beginning.
You have so much on your mind,
But hesitate to tell.
I would love to be there for you
If you would only break your shell
The shell around your heart that is
Protecting yourself from the world
You open up to me slowly
Afraid you might be hurt
As we spend more time together
You start to trust me more
You tell me more about your life
And what you have in store
I am so in tune with you
I can understand your pain
So don’t be hesitant to open up to me
There is nothing to loose and everything to gain
Together we will walk hand in hand and side by side I will be with you forever if that is what you want
